Saturday, April 16, 2011

Day Fifteen; Little Bitty Pretty.

Day Fifteen; Operation Deployment.
i woke up to IMs from my hubby and we got to talk for almost 2 hours on and off because his internet was being mean to us. lol. he misses and loves us so much, and him bot being able to be here for the two of us is really hitting him hard. I don't know what to do to make it easier for him and it breaks my heart.
he says a picture of the ultrasound and our Mizpah coin hang from the display in his room and my letter and picture go with him everywhere he goes. it made me want to cry.
i miss him so much.
but, he's safe and strong, doing well. that's all i can really ask for.

I got my 4th care package in 2 weeks today for Ryder. My sister sent me a box with cute clothes, a toy, and a book. it made me smile. but then made me feel bad because Ryder has gotten things and i havent sent Mikes stuff out yet. lol. this baby is rather spoiled already!

i slept most of the day. just passed out for like, 4 hours and woke up to Ambers text. 
i met her at Nail World and we got pedicures together.
and honestly, it was one of the nicest things i have done for myself in a really long time.
i deserved a little pampering.
my last week as a single person with no tiny baby attatched!
and now while I'm busy obliterating my vagina, at least i can say my toes looked good. =]

i went over to her house to visit with her and Brydan, i fall in love with that little man all the time! he's seriously so precious.
 we talked about my labor plan.
and I'm beginning to get more and more and more irritated with people STILL asking me for updates on my son. Jessica said it right when she told me that obviously these people don't really care what i say because they don't read my blog posts or statuses, and ask anyway.
doesn't matter how long you've known me, or followed my life and pregnancy.
have some respect for my family, my husband nonetheless.
i know I'm doing the right thing.
i've begun unfriending people for asking me, when the baby is due, if i've had him yet, how he's doing, and telling me they can't wait to see pictures.
you'll be lucky if you know he's born a week after he really is.
you won't see pictures for quite some time. you know how slow Afghanistan mail is?
if you're on my "labor team," yes i have my own little team of women there for me, to either me in the room with me, or who actually deserve to know when i go into labor and have him, then back off.
it's hard enough having my husband away, when I'm giving birth to his son. 
i don't need people IMing me up the ass asking about OUR son.
if you havent been where i am, you wouldn't get it.
if you have been where i am and didn't do it this way, i feel sorry for you.

and also, please stop facebook IMing me at all hours of the night.
mainly asking why I'm not asleep.
most of the time i AM asleep, and then I'm woken up.
Facebook chat is how i talk to my husband most often.
i don't need to be hearing the tone and getting excited, just to read about you complaining about your life.
i sleep, A LOT. i'm up very rarely during the day.
everything exhausts me and i can barely function.
so please, unless it's important, don't IM me.
especially all the time, and especially to just complain.
i'm sorry, your life might be bad right now, but trust me.
i'd do ANYTHING to trade places and have it easier for me right now.
be thankful you have your husband next to you at night.
or he gets to hold your child.
and shut the fuck up to me about it.

after leaving Ambers i went and got a Monster and for about, 10 minutes. i felt like i could run a marathon.
then i remembered how fat i was after trying to run up the stairs and changed my mind. =]

i love you M.

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