Friday, October 28, 2011

day 210; this is it.

day 210; operation deployment.

well guys, this is it.
my very last post in the blog of Deployment.
i can actually say i friggen did it, finally.
tonight will be a night of NO sleep, because tomorrow feels like a bigger day than any i have ever lived in my life.
the moment where my husband meets his six month old son.
every streamer is in place, and beer is in the fridge.
i spent the day making sure things are ready and ended up falling asleep with ryder but now we're both wide awake and i have no idea what to do with myself. i feel like my guts are about to fall out of my butt. 
i am at a loss for words.

i want to thank each and every one of you for being there for my family and these past 7 months. i have found out who my true friends are, my family as well. i absolutely love how excited everyone is for tomorrow. it melts my heart. and i hope when you look you go through a deployment you look back and think, "well, if she can do it, so can i." and i will always be around to give you the strength to survive another day. life is really only as difficult as you make it, most days. it has been anything but easy. and here i sit on the eve of my husbands homecoming, finally.
i did it.

i couldnt have gotten through all this without half the people in my life.
monique, even through our ups and downs, amber, and my sons aunt, for being there with be through the birth of my beautiful son, britney, whom i have gotten so close to, for capturing precious moments for his daddy. my mom, of course, for always being just a phone call away. and all my lovely ladies who are just as excited as i am! miss kim, whom i pray, something good happens so she doesn't have to go through what i did, and if she does, i will be there for her EVERY step of the way, samantha, who, shit, we go wayyyyy back! lisette and erika, because they knew what it was like. jessie for staying up late with me because of our insomnia. and my real family to help keep my head above the water. i'm sure i let like, a shit ton of people out so i apologize now. the only thing i have on my mind is... penispenisDADDYANDRYDER... and some more penis.
just sayin

i made it.
and just saying that gives me butterflies.
the next time i get behind the wheel of the durango, i will be going to base to pick up my husband. the next time i enter my house, it will be through my husbands set of keys, and his hand on the doorknob, entering our "home" and starting completely fresh. eventually, i will enjoy the BEST 8 second ride of my life. where we might end up creating our Lyvia... or, Jayce.
this time tomorrow we will be laying ryder down and laying next to each other just laughing, or talking my head on his chest. maybe watching a movie on the mac, or downstairs actin a fool on just dance three. or fuck, just sitting there staring at one another, i can deal with that.

because tonight;
he's here with me.

okay so just writing that took me like, 2 hours because i can no longer focus!!
i'm so very very thankful for all my readers, i have almost 9,500 page views!!! super stoked!!!
however i am sad to say i won't be using blogger for my next blog.
i dont want to continue to be stalked so i will find another site.
not to worry, my blogs are far from over!!!

love always,
CPL Nelson's Wife.
Ryders Mommy.
and one badass fucking female! :)

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